I'll be suspending this blog for a short while as I am assembling a book on how Hollywood's politics are destroying the movies...

Watch this space.

Overheard this past week at the Clinton Memorial Brothel...

SPOKESMAN:  We are proud of the strong relationship between the Hollywood left and the DNC.  Our combined fundraising efforts and the invaluable input of the brilliant Hollywood minds in setting policy...um...Did I mention the fundraising? ... Anyway, we're glad that the major news networks are our free path to the minds of Americ...

...

What?  ABC is doing WHAT?!  They can't do that.  (Can they, Al?  No, seriously...Put down the mirror and help me on this!)  They can't AIR that!  They're actually saying the Clinton administration cooperated in the deaths of 3,000+ people by being continually soft on terrorism? ... That Al Qaeda and the 9/11 plot did NOT form out of thin air in the nine months or so Bush was president before the attack?!  That Clinton was too desperate to be liked -- and to busy covering up his scandals to protect the people in his charge? ... Yeah, I know it's true, but the truth is only the truth when it makes us feel good.  (And look good...Yes, Al...)

Well, we'll stop this.  It's slander!  It's libel.  Worse -- it's 'slibel!'  Whatever we need to say to stop this...Yeah, I know we like to say the Conservatives are the fascists and the censorship freaks...Just keep saying that while we attack freedom of speech and the media...

Don't worry...We'll cuddle up to Hollywood again next week.  That town wouldn't know hypocrisy if it bit 'em -- because it is -- right now.

I'm working on a TV show out here for a producer.  I can't give you any details beyond the fact that it deals with Asian-made cars, so we need some Asian-made women for accompaniment.  (No, it's not Girls Gone Wild Meets Mr. Eddie's Father or some such crap.)  We need cars, models and laughter.  Preferably foreign, except for the laughter.

So, I'm scouring the Internet for modeling sites where we can maybe book necessary talent.  You'd think that was an exciting, stimulating gig, but you'd be surprised over how fast it becomes tiresome and depressing.  Dumb, but beauty-blessed girls with fake fluid-bag enhanced breasts are not attractive.  End of story.

Anyway, I came across THIS MySpace page for a model named Sachiko McLean (maybe the Die Hard hero John McLean's long lost half-sister following some indiscretion during Vietnam...Long before the events at the Nakatomi Plaza...).  But, I digress.  On this model's MySpace page, she writes a political blog.  That's right...A political blog.  Once again...Because we're desperate to know her opinions on global affairs.  We MUST be eager to know what ALL actors, models, singers, et. al. believe on current events -- because, if they can act, sing or stand there and look pretty, they must have the kind of wisdom and insight that only...well...standing around and looking pretty can provide.

Oh, and the cherry on the porn/political sundae?  She's an anti-Semite!  Delightful...

http://www.myspace.com/sachikomclean

I'm fleeing Los Angeles for an end of summer vacation.  But, I'll be back to subvert all that is LA soon enough...

Just a personal observation today...

I was on a date last Spring -- walking Fryman Canyon in Studio City with a nice-enough young lady (a singer, songwriter).  We seemed to be getting along fairly well...until politics popped up its ugly, one-sided Hollywood face.

Now, I know...On a date, don't talk politics or religion.  (And, for the record, don't swear, talk about sports, or bring up past relationships unless she does first, but I digress...)  But, it wasn't me.  It was HER, the Stepford/brainwashed/lock-step/crazy/leftist/conspiracy-minded Hollywood liberal who got the ball rolling uncontrollably down the grassy knoll.

Three things struck me early on in the conversation...She was full of hate.  Absolute, resolute and neverending hate.  Hatred of Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, the Armed Forces, Republicans, Conservative and even moderate Democrats.  She didn't just disagree with them.  She hated them.  Her anger was without limit, and her eagerness to assault these people without end.

Second, she was absolutely convinced she was right.  There was no room for discussion, consideration or compromise in her point of view.  Those people she despised were evil.  End of her story.  When I suggested that it was possible for someone to disagree with her while holding similar human values...Thar blows the anger and hatred again.  I stressed that those on the other side of aisle also thought they were doing the right thing, but it wasn't necessary to believe either side was evil.  I might as well have been trying to tie a knot in jello.

Finally, I was astounded by her astonishment.  It was inconceivable that any rational person -- especially a person living in LA -- could possibly think differently.  To her, everyone thought the way she did.  There was no choice -- no possibility for rebelion or exclusion.  Two options -- agree or accept the tags of "evil," idiot," "fascist," etc.

Mind you, I wasn't bombarding her with my own conservative rhetoric.  I was listening and questioning.  Believe me -- the simple fact that I questioned her seemed to be more than enough to send her head spinning and the venom flowing.  When I finally got around to the fact that I voted for Bush, the date and the relationship were essentially over.  When I explained that John Kerry was a poor candidate because of his constant flip-flops on issues and his record of inactivity in the Senate, all she could offer was, "But, Bush is evil."  How do reply with a rational response to that?

I left her with one final observation before I ran screaming...Sorry...Before I politely departed...I paraphrase:

"I vote for Republicans primarily because, when your guys are in charge, people who want to murder me get a free pass.  They want me dead, and they want you in charge so they can manage that because they know you'll do nothing to stop them."

That was perhaps an overly simplistic explanation of voting choices and the War on Terror, but it left her momentarily speechless.  I think I got one more "Bush is evil..." before I headed out to get a Jamba Juice.

Just a (not so) brief example of the kind of people I have to deal with every single day...

Playing off yesterday's theme of insignificant entertainment personalities sharing their opinions with an apparently desperately wisdom-hungry world, we turn to George Takei...Yeah.  Sulu.

Now, I know you've been asking yourself, where does the former helmsman of the Enterprise stand on global politics and other socioeconomic concerns.  Fortunately, here he sounds off on the War on Terror, Iraq, the Patriot Act, etc.

The ironic bit of hypocrisy in this meandering tirade is his attack on the "gays in the military" policy.  You see, to the surprise of no one, Sulu came out earlier this year.  And, to paraphrase a comedian whose name escapes me, "OUT MAGAZINE asked him to go back in..."  Anyway, he protests the "don't ask/don't tell" policy (founded under his beloved Clinton)...just minutes after he mocked his own sexuality endlessly in his own speech.

I attended the William Shatner roast as described below, and I can tell you Sulu camped up to beat the band with the kind if low-rent gags that set the cause of homosexuals back 30 years.  It was like watching Amos & Andy material, except it was really gay...

Then again, no one ever said you have to have any sense of consistency, humility or perspective to talk politics in Hollywood.

Meanwhile, Sulu...We are genuinely sorry you were imprisoned during the WWII.  You didn't deserve it -- until the 1960s when we all had to watch you act...

...

"I'm a Japanese-American. I grew up behind US barbed-wire fences," Takei told Foley. "We were first taken to the horse stables of Santa Anita Race Track, because the camps weren't built yet. And then when the camps were built, they transported us two-thirds of the way across the county to the swamps of Arkansas...and why were we incarcerated? There were no trials. There were no attorneys. There was no due process. Simply because we happened to look like the people who bombed Pearl Harbor. Yes, I know about racial profiling. And this administration has used fear to terrorize America. Yes, they are the ones who are terrorizing America. There are decent people who just happened to look like the ones who committed that terrible act on September 11, 2001, and they are being profiled and subjected to all these indignities."

"You know, this administration came out with what they call the 'Patriot Act' which is the most disgusting name for an 'Act' that is so un-American," the actor added. "I mean, due process and civil liberties have gone out the window. And this administration continues to tell us that we are terrorized. There are better ways do deal with this. Look at Britain. They caught the people before it happened. Intelligence is what's really important."

"And do you know what they are doing in this country? [The Military] are kicking out Arabic-speaking gay intelligence workers, just because they are gay! What is more important? National security or homophobia? In this administration, it's clearly homophobia and not national security. This administration has it all wrong."

A Fox News reporter noted that Takei seemed very passionate about this subject and asked him what he thought was the answer. "Britain has demonstrated that they can do it. Have good intelligence! By firing Arabic speaking intelligence officers, that is not the way to do it...look at the failure we have in Iraq. It is a disaster. Look at the incompetence we had in dealing with Katrina. In case after case, this administration has been the greatest threat to America."

Asked by the same Fox News reporter whether he could speak in positive terms and to explain why he was at the roast, Takei responded, "I am interested in making a happy, safe, secure, and stable America...I'm here to express my admiration for Captain Kirk. Now he was a great leader...he was charismatic. He was decisive, he knew how to prioritize, and he was played by an actor, who was a very...I mean is a very good actor. Though I think he's late for his autopsy!"

Once at the roast, Takei was the object of jokes about his homosexuality and the fact that he remains best-known for a role he played on television forty years ago, but he was equally ribald, beginning his speech by saying, "I've got a few things to say about this bloated, washed-up, pathetic, no-talent, bald hack cashing in on his fame as a classic TV actor," only to turn and greet host Jason Alexander (Kurros) rather than the expected target of his barb, Shatner. Then he greeted the honoree, "Speaking of fat alcoholics...good evening, Bill. My name is George Tuh-Kay - NOT Tuh-Kai as you've insisted on pronouncing it for the past 40 years. Remember - Takei, like in toupee!"

Takei then announced that he would not go on listing Shatner's physical faults because there were so many other things to make fun of, "Like your acting...of course, I'm only kidding, Bill. Bill is a generous actor. He gave Nichelle Nichols herpes!" Takei then shared a long kiss with fellow roaster Jeffrey Ross and said that Shatner is "a rich, gooey, devil's food cake, that I want to drop my face into and go, 'Brbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbrbr!' [shaking face and making rubbery lip noises]." Acknowledging that he and Shatner have not always been close - Takei was critical of Shatner both in his autobiography, To The Stars, and in several appearances - he added, "Despite our tensions, I'm honored that you invited me to be here with your tonight...as I look over this see of adoring faces, you know, Bill, I've got to confess...maybe you've been right all these years...you really are the center of the universe."

After congratulating Shatner on a wonderful evening, Takei concluded, "As your helmsman and navigator, it's my pleasure to tell you...go to hell!" Comedy Central will air the roast Sunday night at 10 p.m. Eastern time. Some clips, including one of Takei, are available now on the web site.

In the fever swamp aftermath of the drunken Mel Gibson disaster, one Hollywood star stepped up to defend tolerance and justice...

Rob Schneider.  He published an open letter in DAILY VARIETY urging other Jews not to appear in films or otherwise support the filmmaker who made anti-semetic and anti-social comments.  He...Um...

Wait...Rob Schneider?  Rob Schneider?!  THAT Rob Schneider? 

Yup.  I guess so.  At first I thought this was a gag -- a mediocre comic trying to be funny by pretending to be a societal champion.  But, he's serious.  He thinks he matters.  He thinks his opinion and public protest matters.  He obviously forgot he's Rob Schneider!

But, his self-importance and hypocrisy is prime real estate for how full of nonsense Hollywood is.  Schneider is an actor who's deliberately appeared in some of the dumbest, insignificant pieces of fluff you can imagine.  No problem there.  We all need to be entertained.  But, you don't get to make silliness like that and then turn into Mr. Schindler when the moment strikes to get your name in the paper.  If you make money as a dink, you stay a dink publicly.  It's a price you pay.

But, the silliest part of Schneider self-important gas leak is his promise never to cast Gibson or appear in one of his films.  Wow, Rob.  Gutsy move.  Willing to burn that bridge, huh?

Along those lines, I hereby swear never to have intercourse with Salma Hayek...

"LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - The Walt Disney Co. will distribute "Apocalypto," a Mayan-language film by actor-director Mel Gibson, as planned on December 8, a Walt Disney Studios spokeswoman said on Friday."

"That confirmation refutes recent media and Internet reports that family-oriented Disney wanted to sell distribution rights to the film to another studio to distance itself from the controversy over anti-Semitic remarks Gibson made when he was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving last month in Malibu, California."

...

Hollywood goes through its PC fits from time to time, but (while those within the industry will never admit it publicly), money is the only political concern -- the only real morality -- in the business.

Case in point above...Yes, Mel Gibson embarrassed himself with his behavior and his "...Jews cause all the wars..." or "...What are you looking at, Sugar T*ts?" comments.  Yes, he should have to seek some help for his alcoholism and apologize for his ugly drunk remarks.  But, the following industry-wide storm that followed smacked of "all form, no substance" outrage.  The biggest chunk of silliness was the idea that Disney would dump Mel's next flick -- which has nothing to do with Jews, booze or Sugar T*ts -- which, for all I know -- might be some brand of sugary liqueur.

Disney sunk a mouse-load of money into that movie.  And, since no publicity is bad publicity in this town, this MELtdown will only put more backsides in the seats...

"What it's about?  The downfall of the Mayan...WHAT?!  No way.  Won't see it...Huh?  Mel Gibson?  The 'Jews' and 'Sugar T*ts' guy?  Well...Hm.  That's different.  OK...Maybe...Just don't tell our Rabbi..."

Cha-ching, Disney.  And, all The Mouse had to do was roar just enough for appearances sake.

That's what Hollywood and the entertainment business.  Money > Appearance.

"From here you will witness the destruction of the alliance and the end of your insignificant rebelion."
- The Emperor, (RETURN OF THE JEDI)

Well, from HERE I hope you will witness the birth of a new alliance and, maybe, the seeds of my own insignificant rebelion...Or, maybe it'll just entertain you for a few minutes while you eat a muffin or something.

I am a moderate conservative who lives and works in the entertainment industry of Los Angeles, CA.  In fact, I hit the rack just over the hill from Hollywood.  I am awash in a sea of hippies -- surrounded on all sides by a marching zombie army of dishonest, brainwashed extremists.  In fact, I believe the average LA/Hollywood reactionary liberal hippie to be mentally ill.

I'm going to spend my time here examining that mental illness in detail...

Pilgrims...In this case, the Hollywood Pilgrim -- sworn to destroy all hippies...